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Sunday, May 31, 2009

WHAT THE HELL AM I THINKING?

So one of my employers well actually all of my employers are people that are rather close to me. One in particular introduced me to an online dating service. I know I know I know I have spent the last month talking about how I’m on a 90 day vow of celibacy and that all the guys on the internet are assholes yadda yadda yadda… And I still hold fast to that assessment, but I only have 18 days left to my vow and I am curious as to who and what is out there. I’m not going to divulge the website or my screenname for that matter but I will say that this sight seem (so far) to be clearly lacking the usual gay man questionnaire crap.

Not once has it asked my preferable position, or to describe my endowments. I think that’s a good start don’t you? No where have there been crude sexual check boxes or nude pictures. I think these are good signs. I know it’s a little too early to call it at this point but even the profiles seem a little more intellectual and romantic, just what I’m looking for! I mean hey I gotta start somewhere right? Further more the suggested matches don’t seem to be generated my biological puzzle combinations. I have actually enjoyed reading other peoples profiles and finding common interests that require clothing. Who knew?

Like I said it’s way too soon to peg this site or its inhabitants’ but mark my words at the very least I’ll have a new and juice source of man bashing. But maybe there will be someone worth mentioning too!

Who’s your sex broker?

Has the economy affected your personal life? Has the stock market crash damaged your libido? Have plunging interest rates instill a fear that it will never go back up? Are you afraid you may break more then your hip riding the bull? Or are you disappointed from the last bear rally you hosted?

Today has been a rather strange day for me. I woke up from a sex dream involving my ex and not that the sex was anywhere near a nightmare or that the dream was either, it only made me wake irritated and disassociated with consciousness. I have 19 days left to my no sex vow and I think I’m further away from human contact then when I was MANHUNTING. To further add insult to injury I indulged in some retail therapy today, new shirts, a pair of shorts, (resentment towards my waist size) and even a pair of new high-tops like all the other kids are wearing. Now I even managed to go grocery shopping, hit the drug store for sundries, and did two loads of laundry. However my day went to shit when I was invited to go to the movies with my neighbor and his boyfriend.

Look I’m not trying to rain on anyone’s parade but I’ve done the third wheel with these two before and it’s rather sickening. They are the cuddly kissy lets make out on the train and everywhere else kind of couple. I seriously support violence in these situations. Now they promised to not be annoying but you can’t turn it off. When people have what you want (dysfunctional or not) it doesn’t matter whether or not they act out the behaviors you want to beat them over, because they are already oozing out the happy lovey dovey stinky puss from their pores and it just smells bad. I love you guys you’re both great (I know you’re reading this C) but seriously I can’t be seen with the two of you. Now there was a prospect of another person joining us originally as a blink date for me (and yeah maybe this has something to do with it) but I was really willing to go because I wouldn’t have to be grossed out again by myself. Misery loves company and I’ll be damned if I’m gonna be suffering alone.

So the stock market is rallying, the economy is starting to recover, hell even I have 3 jobs right now (not counting my blog and five other service commitments I have). I’m starting to have funds in my pocket again so that I could actually afford to go out on a date again, but I don’t think I want to. I feel like just going back to the online sites and having meaningless one nighters, that will simply scratch the itch, and trust me people it’s itchy. What do I do? Do I put my money back in penny stock or do I keep holding out for the right investment?